“Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear.”
- Ephesians 4:29
With the rise of the internet, there has been a push to “call out” people – to tell them when they are wrong, prejudice, or just plain mean. I am sure most people have seen this type of interaction across social media.
That said, the judgement laden tone of some of these posts can make me uncomfortable, or ‘cringe’ in internet vernacular. Even though, I may also believe the perpetrator being “called out” is acting inappropriately. Even though, I may also want to help the perpetrator find a better way to live. Even though, I also feel the pain behind the words of the person who is “calling out” that perpetrator. Still, these “call out” posts make me uncomfortable because it does not seem like communication. Rather, these words of frustration seem like they are judging the perpetrator.
I could be wrong here and I accept that the act of “calling out” may not be judgmental; rather, this type of internet repartee may be meant to bring light to the darkness. So, we can all become better humans.
But, would you confront a person face-to-face with the same tone as some of these posts? Would you call people names and demean them over something they said which was inappropriate? If you did, would that “calling out” interaction, in a face-to-face form, build up your relationship or drive a wedge between you and the person?
Today, we are self-quarantining and communication is more important than ever. Because, we may not be able to avoid that person in our family who has made us feel bad or less than another. Furthermore, we may only have physical interaction with one or two people; so, each person is vital to our mental health. Therefore, we must remember how to communicate with each other face-to- face, re-learn to use skills that build up a relationship, and set aside the “evil talk” that separates us from one another.
Now, I am not saying that we should not stand up for ourselves, especially when people are being hateful and mean.
Rather, I am simply saying let us be kind and communicate with each other as the apostle Paul suggested: in a way “that your words may give grace to those who hear.” By returning to the skills of face-to-face communication our family, our community, our society can become stronger and learn to communicate even when there is a computer screen between us.
-May these words and the meditations on all our hearts be pleasing to you, God, as we re-learn how to talk to one another. Amen.
